Yeah, I’ve been slacking—again. Can’t say I have a good reason. Can’t say I have much to write or recap. I’ve been writing a little here and there. I’ve also admitted to myself that I’m not happy doing this 9---5 grind; to clarify, my status quo answer was that I am “content”. I’m not that. I believe I’m supposed to do more than what it is I’m doing right now. That belief gives me a feeling of discontent and a lack of feeling fulfilled. I think in the end, we all want to do something that matters—to ourselves and to others. I’m grateful for all of my blessings, and should probably say that more, but I do think I need to be pushing for my dreams. None of those dreams had anything to do with working in a cube at 45 years old.

So, I am writing, and I’m more actively trying to structure a way to make things happen. I thin the earlier said admission was vital though, because I didn’t want to seem like I was ungrateful—because I’m not. I also have been struggling with the notion of upholding the family legacy so to speak, and creating my own. But, I think by creating my own, I’d still be upholding and carrying forth the family legacy. Oh, the legacy? Yeah, see—my father’s mother has a doctorate, as does my mother and her older sister. Her baby sister has four masters degrees, and pops has 3.

So, yeah, I could go on about the accomplishments of family, and more importantly, the struggle they endured to position myself and my cousins and siblings to step further up that ladder. I feel like we as a generation haven’t upheld our end of the deal. I want to get a master’s maybe even two, just cause I like learning. But I want to do so on my terms; I feel like a part of me wants to get one right now to be more in line with the family legacy—the cultural one too. But, doing so would likely further entrench me in a system I want out of.

So yeah, not much to write. I’m just trying to figure out how I want to live my life all while handling my existing responsibilities. Oh, and pursuit of something that’s not easily acquired is a frustrating process—man. I hope all is well with you and yours. I will get back to it…just sorting through some things right now.

Oh, yeah, one more thing…I tripped up the metro escalator yesterday—hard!!! Now one you can play off, because I’ve tripped up the escalator before, but always a small one that I could catch myself with on my hands. Now, I didn’t bust my grill or anything, but I jacked my knee up. Fortunately, I didn’t get any muscle tissue or anything like that, just bone (which isn’t as swollen as yesterday). Yesterday was the worst, I don’t know what was going on yesterday, ya’ll. Today feels much better, though.