Musing & Muted Monologues...

Trying to Make Sense of It All...

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Stymied & stifled...

I just needed to take a sec to get my brain moving. I’ve been trying to get this project off my plate for some time now, but things kept jumping up and taking precedence over it, for like two months damn near. Now, all I really have is this project, and I’m stifled creatively right now. I hate sitting on projects or letting too much time go by (more so in the professional environment). This damn project, though small, has become the bane of my professional existence. Can’t wait to get this monkey off my back.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Saywhusayhuh?

I find it interesting how many people try tot take me to task for not picking up the phone and calling more often. Yet these same individuals don’t make any additional effort to do what they’re getting on me about. Now, granted, I do have an issue with calling people. I acknowledge that. I’m bad with calling people. That said, I also let people know that I have an issue with calling people (consistently) and that I’m bad at it. I’ll also throw in a disclaimer about me being pretty good at keeping up with people via email. If you write me, I tend to write back. There are tons of electronic mediums with which to communicate, and we’re hung up on picking up the phone. However, if some one makes an effort to reach out to me, it’s not as though I’m making myself unavailable.

OK, so some will read that and possibly think, “Well damn Lee, in order to catch up with you, I have to do all the work?” and my answer to that is, “Certainly not—but you can’t get mad at me for not doing something you aren’t doing yourself.” Bottom line: a phone is a two-way device. Now if my own mother, who I love dearly, understands that she isn’t likely to have protracted phone conversations with me unless there is something that really needs to be discussed; if she understands that I just don’t like to be on the phone like that, then why can’t everybody else? It’s not like my aim is to dodge some one or to spite some one. And yes, there are even times that I might even stay in touch with some one for a stretch, but it’ll most likely change up at some point. No clever way to end this; Not trying to piss anybody off or slight anybody, I just don’t really feel it.

Friday, April 17, 2009

and when it alls seems hopeless, you say the words to put me back in focus...

Couldn't figure out what I wanted to entitle this entry, and Pac jumped into my brain. If you think about all of the musical legends who died way too young (Bob Marley, Sam Cooke, John Lennon, Otis Redding, Marvin Gaye, 2Pac, Jimi Hendrix, etc.), the groundbreaking legends, that changed the musical AND social landscape, imagine what the world would be like if they were still here. Anyway, back to the entry--

Yeah, this is Lee (the Poet), back up in the spot...or whatever, I don't know. What's good, ya'll? Word? That's what's up. Me? Oh, well, I'm hopefully going to sit down and get some writing out. My aim is to start small; there's this short story I want to hash out, and I've been sitting on it for a while now. I think I had a dream about this, or, I don't quite remember. Most of the significant dreams I either forget, or some how get lost in translation. It's a dope concept that would translate excellently to screen. But, I don't have the patience or desire to write a screenplay on this bad boy. I just want to sit down and write it out, and see what I can do with it once I'm finished.

The other thing I wanna do is look for a voice over casting agent. I happen to be quite well versed in the art of vocal mimicry and wanted to do voice acting since I was a likkle yout, sin? So, those are two simple projects to get started on. I don't necessarily expect to finish the short story, but this is not an impossible task if I actually focus and get in a good groove. The good groove I can't really control, but the focus part I can. Outside of that, I think I'm going to restart my cardio regimen...maybe the jumping rope routine. It had me in decent cardiovascular shape, I just got tired of the same routine after like the 7th or 8th month. We'll see, though. Starting ain't so hard, it's making it stick that makes it difficult sometimes.

On another note, I have a friend who put me on notice by saying I should be in NY at least once a month, getting the lay of the land, doing poetry spots, looking for voice work, etc. Know what? He's absolutely right. I'm going to start pushing towards that.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Lee-isms, Volume 1

Jason Stathamverb/noun – to witness or become victim of a highly improbable act; often achieved with little reason or effort.
Synonyms: Bamboozled
Example Sentence: I just got Jason Statham’d last weekend when my brother beat me in NBA 2K 2 with a double overtime, buzzer beating, running, underhanded “Grandma” shot...from half-court by Quinn of the Miami Heat.

Lee’s Logic: While entertaining some of the times(I dug The Italian Job, Lock Stock…, & Snatch), many of Mr. Statham’s recent movies have been so far fetched, that only Jason Statham could pull it off. For example, Crank 2, focuses on an individual who drops a few thousand feet from a helicopter (after doing multiple drugs), and is abducted to have his (what should be useless) heart harvested. This guy (Chev), then goes on a citywide spree beating peoples ass AFTER he has his heart taken, trying to get it back.
Now, Etan Thomas of the Washington Wizards, a pretty fit guy, I might add, had elective hard surgery, and it took more than a month for him to walk a short distance without becoming winded…and he still had a heart! I’m just saying. Transporter 2 was so much more outlandish than Transporter 1 that I didn’t even bother seeing Transporter 3.

-----------

M. Knightverb/noun – An event or set of circumstances that initially looks promising, but turns out to be a monumental waste of time.
Synonyms: Conned, Hoodwinked
Example Sentence: Remembering that I was M. Knighted by going out with old girl from last week still raises my ire.

Lee’s Logic: C’mon, you’ve seen M. Knight Shylaman’s body of work. Unbreakable, Signs...The Village!

Monday, April 06, 2009

Hard Admissions, part 1

It secretly bothers me that I don't have any children yet, because all of my nieces and nephews have the opportunity to know and interact with my grandparents, and children don't seem to be anywhere on the the immediate horizon for me. The plan is still to go about it the old-fashioned way, you know, the whole marriage thing first. But damn, I have to find someone that I feel I can marry first, huh?

Life gets complicated as we get older, primarily because as we get older, we develop more sound rationales as to why we can't do something our heart desires. We become masters at denying our own dreams, often using life and it's (often self inflicted) circumstances as excuses.

I admit that I sometimes run from my own destiny, my own blessings. Although I can be a great decision-maker/time-manager (especially in crunch time), long-term decisions are a problem sometimes. I hate to make mistakes. Not afraid of failing, but making mistakes bothers me. Weird I know.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

What is Love?

What is love? Love is often nothing more than a theory without application. An overly romanticized concept with amorphous aptitudes. Vacillating between idealistic and lofty, to lascivious and lewd. Who’d be able to articulate a definition with which we all agree? Well, I humbly submit that love is incomplete when directed at others if not first genuinely directed inwardly. To love yourself true, you must take stock of all the flaws within you. Change what can be changed and except what can not. Outwardly reflect self love, for loving just you would be the loneliest of lots. Indeed, to love others as one loves themselves is often the most Herculean of tasks, one that many of us simply do not pass. And still I ask, what is love? I believe it defies definition, for definitions are limiting, and one should not define that which knows no boundaries. That is as foolhardy as trying to define God. So, my only reply that feels correct. God—is love.