There are too many times where I feel old, but I do feel a little old in one way: I'm starting to look at myself in that "Useta" (use to) way. You know, I useta be like this, or I useta do that.

*Sidebar Tangent: Isn't "use" a strange little word? It doesn't look anything like it sounds...

Not all of the useta stuff is stuff I should or even do miss, but I useta be more focused. I think part of that is because I do a lot more now. My mind is more scattered often. I used to know squat about mortgage rates and insurance coordination of benefits procedures, and that technical stuff does not play well with the right side of my brain. When I go that left with my brain, I really have a problem trying to get back to the center, much less the far right where all the really creative stuff is.

I useta be more focused. Here it is I finally (after years of indecisiveness) decided which graphic novel I want to run with first (out of 4...technically 5 concepts), and I come up with an animated series idea that I want to run with. This jon't is funny as hell, but if I told you the concept, you'd probably think it was boring. I'm going to try to write up a treatment for it this weekend. The animation is supposed to be pretty crude, kinda like a mix between home movies and south park. Definitely not going with the 30-60 frames of cel animation on this. Key frames all the way. So, this means I have to get some animation software that I can get up and running pretty quickly, something like ToonBoom, which I heard is pretty good, but I have to research. Also curious about MangaStudio & AnimeStudio.

Oh, this doesn't negate the demos I want to finish soon. (sigh) It feels like I need to slow down and speed up at the same time. One thing is for sure, I definitely need more execution of ideas. I just got some new tech toys over the past few months, so I should have some good motivation to start knocking things out soon.

The Oxford Effusing
I am inextricably befuddled by the skinny jeans phenomenon that has swept our urban landscape. It boggles the mind. Fitted jeans, while at times effeminate, can be worn by men or women. Skinny jeans are for women. They're meant to accentuate form. Yet dudes are intent on wearing skinny jeans, and often hanging off of their posterior, as if I'm interested in the brand and/or pattern of their undergarments. If one is predisposed to the predilection of wearing the aforementioned style of clothing while exposing their entire posterior, might I suggest a pair of thigh-high boots without the disturbingly tight jeans to interfere with the notion that you want the whole world to see your behind? It would be making much more of an original statement than the accepted predesignated method.

The Layman's Lament
Skinny jeans are suspect, and this shit has gone too far. Men aren't supposed to wear skinny jeans, because skinny jeans are designed for women, not men. Wearing clothes designed for women is cross-dressing in my book, I don't care if it's acceptable. That shit is not hip hop, and it damn sure ain't gangsta. Ya'll look like Riley Esco with the wrap-skirts right about now. Real talk, why not just wear some chaps with the ass out (a la T.A.F.K.A.P (Prince...geniuses)), or put on some thigh high boots with a pair of Vickies? I can understand wearing jeans low on the waist, but why wear pants if I can see your entire undergarments? Pants are supposed to go over your underwear. That's the concept. Yeah man, work that out...

Heard something pretty deep a moment ago (paraphrasing here):

"Everything created is a solution. My watch solves a problem. My glasses solve a problem. My ears hear, my hands touch...God saw a problem that no one lse could solve, so He created you. That's why nobody understands you, there has never been another you before."

There was more, but the dude is still talking, so I'll holla back later...

So uhh, wouldn't mandatory appointments in an urgent care facility kind of defeat the purpose of an urgent care facility? If you have time to make an appointment, is it really that urgent? I'm just saying man, am I lunchin' out, or is am I lunchin' out?

...and Trick love the kids. Likewise, so am I and so do I. With that said, I feel good having gone to DC Prep school and talking to/performing for the 7th graders over there. Interesting how kids think, too, man. When I spoke about Emitt Till, one young lady asked what would happen if Jim Crow was reversed and they went after the white lady instead of Emitt Till. Crazy right? That seems like a poem in itself. It's been a while since I did outreach like that, but it felt really good to do that. My boy Kyle said he needed some poets to come through and represent for one of his elementary school friends, who now teaches over @ DC Prep. Wasn't a thing, so I went through and spoke with them like young adults along with Kyle. That's a great time to reach them, because that's the time they start to figure out things, and also when they start to go one way or the other. I tip my hat to all of those in the struggle fighting the good fight.

----------------
Now playing: 13 Of Nazareth - Unknown Souljah

Not that I ice skate, but if I did, this would be even more poignant, or maybe not. Hell, I don't ice skate, so what do I know? I just know it sounded really cool when Wesley Snipes (as Blade) said it at the end of the first (and in my opinion, the best)Blade movie.

So, to the crux of the matter, the heart if you will...I feel like I'm ice skating uphill. See, I know a little something about bad web design, as I've implemented enough of my own over the years; so I know why my job should change their web site, if for no other reason than it's poorly done. Virtually everybody complains about it, and many of those who work here can't find stuff on it. This ain't any low profile site, it's a government site...federal government at that. It's poorly structured, slow, ugly, and I hear it doesn't wash it's hands after it goes to the bathroom. But I won't hold that last one against it because that's an unconfirmed rumor at this point.

I know the things that can improve the look, feel and functionality of the site. I can prove my case unequivocably. I can even do it in an Elmo voice with a Darth Vader mask on, but it ain't gonna happen if nobody wants to agree to work together. So here's me, really pasionate about something at work, and hoping I'll get the legitimate opportunity to make a difference. We'll see how it goes.

Oh, apparently, the Wizards still suck :( and will continue to do so for some time, as they find it nigh impossible to win back to back games, meaning at best they'd have a 50% record were they to win every other game, which would be a blessing compared to this terrible season we're having. I'm alsmost embarrassed to admit I'm a fan, but, we've been marginal most of the time I've been a live, sooooo...yeah.

I'm dog tired right now, though it felt like it was three times worse yesterday. I don't have the energy to create right now, so I will look to get back on the horse tomorrow. It's bad enough I still have to drive out of my way to drop my clothes off at the cleaners after I get off the train this evening. Damn, I have some laundry to do tonight to, huh?! Damn. Superbowl Sunday threw off my laundry day. I'm just trying to stay awake until quitting time man...hopefully I can get a nap on the train.