It has been quite a while since I've last journaled in this blog. It's not that I haven't had anything to write about, just didn't know what to write about per se. SO much has been going on, and yet I feel like there's so much I need to accomplish. I've been running in very large circles, or at least that's the way it feels. For those not in the know, (which is a lot, but not intentionally) I now am working in the mortgage industry as a loan officer and financial advisor. I have a study session tonght for this insurance exam that I'll be taking within the next few weeks (God willing). So, what's the deal with that you ask? Yeah, I know... I have and had no intent to be in this field...but it's an opportunity to learn and help people and make money all in one fell swoop. here have been a lot of minor lessons that I choose not to repeat, but, this experience has opened my eyes in many ways.
Aside from that, I'm trying to figure a way to not be single...but not tied down. It's weird...I don't like the concept of running around in this day in age, yet I love women. Haven't found that one that makes me want to swear them off, sooooo...what do I do?
Homecoming is just around the bend...and as usual, thoughts of "her" creep into the corners of my mind. Will I see her, the one that inspired many a poem? I have to admit, there's a small part of me that's motivated to go to Homecoming solely to see her. Besides being utterly open by her, she has no idea of the effect she had on my growth as a writer. She was my first full-time muse...and part of me will always miss/long for her for that very reason. Writer's block, rather, the disinterest with writing as of late is definately making me feel that more. Then again, she truly doesn't know how much I dug her. In som twisted way, I think I didn't step to her just to keep the fantasy alive. (sigh) Creative folks and artists make for interestin bedfellows, but I couldn't stand to be with a chick as artsy as me, I don't think. All the angst and unpredictable moodiness would give me migraines.
There isn't anything really to this entry, other than this is the 496 entry in this journal. Wow. I captured some years in this thing; as much as I said, there's much I admitted, yet many of these entries still bear the gngerprints of the time they represent...errrr...I can remember the shit I omitted.
I think I'll be back to writing soon...just working some things out...exorcising demons without a pad and pen. Oh, the CD is in limbo...my boy moved to ATL while we were in the middle of production, so it's hard trying to connect. Hopefully the joint'll be done by the end of the year. I am getting impatient to get the damn thing done, though.
*Also...the illpoets.com site will be changing servers soon, which is why I haven't been doing anything with it as of late. As a result, there will be some kinks here and there, but hopefully I can make the transition as smooth as possible. We'll see, though. I will holla.
Promise!
One.Love.One.God